Facebook and other social media sites are known for their ease of spreading a message. They are fast, free and allow you to reach all of your “friends” with just a click of a button.
Our Facebook posts display the emotions and day-to-day drama of our lives to our friends. This can be helpful communicating with long distance friends and family. However, social media sites become a highly problematic forum when you are in the process of divorcing.
If you are in the midst of divorcing, consider social media off limits.
As tempting as it may be to show the world—including your soon-to-be-ex—how great you are doing, resist at all costs. This includes posting pictures of yourself at parties or bars, cozying up with someone else or enjoying your newly single life. Avoid using social media as an outlet to air your pain and suffering as well.
Similarly, avoid dating websites and apps until after your divorce is finalized. Dating websites are not private and are easy for anyone, including your spouse, to search.
Emotions are already inflamed. To seek a psychological response that will hurt, anger or otherwise aggravate your spouse only serves to sabotage your interests in the divorce.
What’s The Harm?
Can’t resist? Deleting Facebook images or posts after-the-fact will not protect you. Nothing online is private or ever truly gone after being deleted. The damage will already have been done. There are plenty of back-end searchable databases that catalog your online activity and screenshots can easily be taken by any person online of your posts, tweets or photos and later used against you in matters pertaining to alimony, parental responsibility, parental time-sharing and more.
The satisfaction of getting a “so there!” or “take that!” punch in through social media and dating sites is short-lived at best. It can have permanent and negative consequences in your divorce.
The Benefits of Good Behavior
Keep focused on your ultimate goals when the divorce is over. Only confide your frustrations to trusted friends, family, a certified counselor or clergy. It will be much easier to attain what is in your best interest if you take the high road on social media rather than airing your dirty laundry for all your “friends” to see.
Avoid or be extremely cautious, when using social media during the difficult period before your divorce is final. This will make you emotionally stronger and prepare you for your future—without the worry or regret of hitting “post,” “tweet” or “wink.”
Neal. via photopin cc